“I’m sorry if that hurts you.”
“I’m sorry if that offends you,”
“I’m sorry for crying.”
If you are anything like me, you’ve said those things above or something just like it. You have found yourself expressing how “sorry” you are for speaking up for yourself, for expressing your feelings, for speaking your truth, for feeling your emotions and for showing something other that the perfect persona you have cultivated.
We go to our boss with “sorry for bothering you,” and we deal with conflict by saying “sorry if I hurt your feelings,” We apologize if we cry because tears make people uncomfortable. We bite back our rage and if it comes out, we are “sorry” for expressing it.
And you know what?
I’m done being sorry.
I’m done feeling like I shouldn’t speak my truth because it might make someone feel bad.
I’m done not allowing the full expression of who I am because my tears might make someone uncomfortable.
I’m done being “sorry” for asking for what I need.
I’m done not expressing my feelings, even anger, because others feel it’s unseemly to do so.
So, I’m not sorry for speaking my truth. I’m not sorry my tears caused you to feel uncomfortable. I’m not even slightly sorry that my perfectly just anger triggered you. I am not sorry for asking for what I need. I’m not sorry that my self-love feels threatening to you. I’m not sorry that I am honest about how I feel.
Mostly, I’m not sorry that I no longer feel obligated to feel sorry.
Original post: https://www.elephantjournal.com/2015/08/still-not-sorry/